can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Randomize
