i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
