i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
I have a voicemail from Mike at 1am. He starts to say something, but then throws up instead.
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
