I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
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