I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
Randomize
