so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
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