so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Randomize
