paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
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