the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Randomize