Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
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