Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
Randomize
