My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
Randomize
