ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
Randomize
