If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
wow bdsm is so cute
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