Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry dcoursler hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(818): View more from California

i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body

Fav 4 1354 957
share tweet
(978): View more from Massachusetts

i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis

Fav 8 1191 4234
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(831): View more from California

she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?

Fav 80 14873 2884
share tweet
(703): View more from Virginia

I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.

Fav 4 2703 1312
share tweet
(732): View more from New Jersey

There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice

Fav 7 2632 1003
share tweet
(540): View more from Virginia

i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on

Fav 1 1498 883
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(805): View more from California

No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.

Fav 5 2488 812
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(862): View more from New Jersey

We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae

Fav 0 471 215
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(410): View more from Maryland

dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity

Fav 0 65 20
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT