We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
Randomize
