READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
