So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
Randomize
