I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Randomize
