why didn't you poke me back
Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
