Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
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