addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
Randomize
