Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
Randomize
