dude i'm inner monologue high
I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
Randomize