is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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