He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
