I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I can text with my tongue
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
Randomize
