And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
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