Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
Randomize