Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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