I CAN MOONWALK!
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
Randomize
