I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
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