Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize