Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
Randomize
