i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
Randomize
