You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
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