i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
This is the high leading the old right now
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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