I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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