I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
Less talking, more tequila
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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