So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize
