You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Randomize
