Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
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