i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
Randomize
