i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
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