Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
Randomize
