It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
