i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
Randomize
