someone get that fucking seahorse.
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
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