the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Randomize