shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
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