I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
Text me some of your sweat
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize